10 years ago
“Maki, sweetheart, be careful with the cars parked along the street. Don’t kick the ball towards them,” Rebecca called as her son, Malakai, ran to his room to get his football.
The eight year old boy was everything a mother could want. She wished all the mothers in the world could be blessed with a child like hers. Her small boy, with caramel colored skin, and small cropped curly hair, which he inherited from his father, was full of life and energy. As he ran back into the kitchen with the white and black ball in his hands, he looked at her with a wide smile on his face, his eyes sparkling with joy and mischief the likes of which only an eight-year-old could get into. His easy smile and his striking green eyes he had inherited from her.
“Did you hear what I said?” she asked in her singsong tone which gave away her British heritage.
“Yes, mum. Be careful with the cars. Why are there cars parked in front of the house anyway?”
It was funny to hear her little one speak. While he spoke with the accent of the country, he still had the cadence of his father who was American.
“The Smiths are having a party for their daughter’s birthday,” Rebecca answered, walking to her son and caressing his small head. “Now, who’s coming to play with you?”
“Robert,” Malakai answered.
Robert was the kid of the neighbors, two doors down, and Malakai’s best friend. Both children played football on the local team during the summer months and greatly enjoyed it.
“Okay. Now, you be careful and have fun.”
He threw her another smile then ran toward the front door and out to the front yard. Rebecca looked through the kitchen window and saw her pride and joy run around with his friend on the front lawn. With a smile, she walked to the refrigerator and began to prepare a snack when her phone vibrate, the phone that usually remained silent, the phone that could only mean the agency had an assignment for her.
But she didn’t want assignments anymore.
The glory of being a spy had died down a few years ago when she had been called away from Maki and his father for over two months. Ever since, she had dreaded any calls to that phone. During the last month, she had put in her paperwork to retire from the field and be assigned a home office position. It would mean moving back to the United States but at this point, she didn’t care. She wanted to be home with her family.
“Rebecca,” she said as she flipped on the phone.
It was a simple model with barely any internet capability. It was also a burner phone which could not be traced.
“We want to see you tomorrow; eight o’clock,” said the voice at the other end.
“Okay,” Rebecca said with a sigh. “I’ll be there.”
Thankfully, Maki’s father wasn’t working and would be home to look after him.
As she hung up, Rebecca felt a shiver run down her spin. She couldn’t shake the feeling that something was wrong, that something really bad would come out of whatever the agency wanted with her this time. But she couldn’t do anything about it now.
With another sigh, she retrieved the juice from the refrigerator, poured it in glasses, then walked to the front door. As she normally did, she looked around the neighborhood and took in her surroundings. As a spy, doing so had kept her alive more than once. She saw the car coming down the street at a speed that was well above the limit for a residential street; she saw Maki kick the ball between the two parked cars; she saw Maki and his friend run toward the ball to retrieve it; she saw what was about to happen and dropping the glasses to the ground, she screamed at the top of her lungs.
“Malakai!”
Malakai stopped and looked up at his mother, guilt written all over his face.
But Robert didn’t stop.
In horror, Rebecca saw it all; the ball rolling in the street, Robert chasing it, the car screeching to a halt, Robert flying in the air and landing on the pavement ten feet away.
Then Malakai was turning around and running to the street.
Rebecca ran to her son and grabbed him, but not before he could see the blood pooling under his friend’s head, not before he could see the eyes of his friend staring unseeingly at the sky.
Rebecca hugged Maki to her side and Maki’s little arms held on to her for dear life, his face hidden in her shirt, tears seeping through to her skin. He wasn’t screaming, he wasn’t crying out loud, he was just shaking, holding on to her, crying silently. And Rebecca’s heart broke as the driver got out of his car and began screaming in anguish, holding his head in his head, and falling to his knees, next to the boy who would no longer be. He was young, the man, no older than twenty-five if Rebecca could venture a guess.
Neighbors were now getting out of their house, watching in horror as the man cried next to Robert’s body, most of them immobile, some of them running back into their houses for reasons Rebecca could not explain.
Then came Robert’s mother, running down the street, crying hysterically.
In the background, an ambulance could be heard.
And all Rebecca could do was hold on to Maki, thinking it could have been her son too, thinking, had she not screamed his name, he would have run into the street after his friend and would be dead.
Her boy.
Her reason to live.
Then the ambulance arrived, but Rebecca knew it was too late.
The cops came and asked questions, questions Rebecca answered in a daze, all the while holding Malakai against her side, all the while feeling his little arms around her. They never wavered, his little arms. They just kept on holding her, never letting go, not even for a moment.
Then Malakai Senior came.
Malak, her nickname for him was.
Malak who was putting his arm around her shoulders as the cops were leaving.
The body had been removed, the car had been towed, the driver had been taken away, and even standing there, Rebecca couldn’t remember any of it.
“Come,” Malak said gently.
He was a gentle man, Maki’s father.
Rebecca remembered when she had first seen him, in his Marines uniform, at the Agency headquarters in Virginia. He was military when he had been recruited by the agency, and now his military career was his cover. Upon seeing him, Rebecca had had a crush right away. She had been twenty four years old. The agency had always encouraged its employees to date within its rank, and Rebecca had been happy to oblige when the tall chocolate brown man had taken her on a date, which lead to another, then another, then marriage one year later, then a transfer to the UK, and a year after that, she told the agency she was pregnant with Maki.
As Malak turned her towards the house, Robert’s mother came running towards them.
“It’s your fault!” she screamed at Rebecca. “Where were you when it all happened? You weren’t even there.”
At the sound of the screaming voice, Maki flinched against her side.
The woman’s features were distorted by pain and grief, pain and grief Rebecca also felt. She was a mother after all.
And what could she say to lessen such a pain?
Rebecca just looked at her, tears streaming from her eyes. She didn’t have anything to say. She couldn’t say anything that would make this any less painful.
“Marge, Rebecca did what she could,” Malak said gently. “And she was watching the kids.”
“No she wasn’t! If she were, this would never have happened. If they had played in my front garden, this would not have happened.”
“You don’t know that,” Malak said.
Rebecca took comfort in his support, in his strong but calm voice, in the way he was holding her shoulders against his broad chest.
Rebecca had almost lost her son, this little bundle of life that was clinging to her with all his desperate strength.
Gently, Malak pushed Rebecca towards the house while he kept talking to the distraught mother, trying to calm her.
“Come,” she told Maki who was yet to let go of her.
They walked into the house, Maki still holding on to her like the frightened child that he was. Once in the house, she leaned down and took him in her arms. He was heavy. She hadn’t done that in over two years and her little boy wasn’t as little as she remembered him to be.
She was struggling up the stairs when Malak ran to her and took Maki in his strong arms.
“Are you okay?” he asked, caressing her cheek with his big hand, holding Maki against his side.
Her small boy had put his arms around his father’s neck and his head was resting on the wide shoulder. Wiping her tears, Rebecca nodded, giving Malak a sad watery smile.
“What happened?” he asked as he got up the stairs.
“I…I…”
Rebecca didn’t know what to say. In fact, she didn’t want to say anything with Maki nearby. He was scared enough as it was, she didn’t want him to relive it by her talking about it.
“Later,” she mouthed, without a sound, then looked pointedly at Maki.
Malak nodded gravely.
Later that night, while Maki slept on the bed next to her, Rebecca, laying on her side, looked at Malak who was putting away his clothes and getting ready for the night. They hadn’t had a chance to talk earlier as Maki had required all of their attention.
“It’s all my fault,” were the first words he had said.
“Why would you think that?” Malak had asked gently while Rebecca had been ready to jump in and deny it vehemently.
But Malak’s approach had probably been the best as it would uncover the root cause of the thought.
“Mum told me not to kick the ball towards the cars,” he had said, tears coming down his round little cheeks. “I didn’t listen.”
“It’s not your fault, sweetheart,” Rebecca had said, her heart breaking with each tear that was falling from Maki’s eyes. “You both were told you should not play in the street, not just you.”
“But if I hadn’t…”
“Hey, stop it Junior,” Malak had said gently, putting his hands on the small shoulders. “Sometimes, things happened and we think it’s our fault but in reality, it’s not. Yes, you did kick the ball between the two cars, it is true, but your mother is right: you both knew not to run into the street. I know you do it often but you know it’s not right. You should always look. Also, this person who hit Robert, he was going very fast, a lot faster than he should have, and that’s his fault, not yours. If he had gone at the speed limit, this may not have happened at all.
“It’s not because of you, Maki, it’s because of a chain of circumstances that resulted in something horrible. Do you understand what I’m trying to tell you?”
Maki had nodded then got into bed where Rebecca was waiting for him.
“He asleep?” Malak asked, looking at Maki on the bed next to her.
“I think so,” she answered quietly.
“Wanna tell me what happened?”
And she did, crying all the while, caressing Maki’s little head, reliving the fear of losing the most precious thing in the world.
How she needed to be hugged, to feel Malak’s strong arms around her, to hear him say everything was alright, that Maki was all right. And he must have known what she needed as he slipped in bed behind her, pulling her to his chest, his hands caressing her belly.
“He’s here, Becca,” he whispered to her ear, making shivers run down her back. “He’s here and he’s safe.”
How she loved that man, the father of her child, the man who always seemed to know what to do to make her feel better. She leaned into him, taking comfort in his warmth, in his presence. Even after nine years of marriage, she still felt as in love with him as the day she had met him.
“The agency called me today,” she said after a few moments of silence.
His hands stilled on her belly.
“I don’t want to go, Malak,” she said.
“I thought you told them you were done.”
“I did. But they still want to see me and I’m scared, Malak,” she said, turning to face him. “I have so much to lose. And Maki needs us right now, both of us.”
“It’s only a meeting,” Malak said, smiling at her and caressing her cheek.
She knew he was trying to be optimistic but when it came to the agency, Rebecca had lost that disillusion years ago.
“Maybe it’s nothing more than them making sure retiring is really what you want.”
“It is what I want. There’s no doubt about that. I’m thirty-four years old, Malak, I’m getting too old for all this. And…”
But she didn’t finish her sentence. She just looked down, at Malak’s strong chest.
“And what, Becca?” he asked, putting a finger under her chin and raising her head so she would look at him.
“I…I want another child,” she said. “I want another little Maki running around.”
The smile Malak gave her would have lightened a dark room it was so bright.
“Did I tell you how much I love you?” he said, pulling her to him and kissing her.
The kiss was full of promises, full of possibilities, full of tomorrows, and by the feel of Malak against her stomach, Rebecca was sure if Maki hadn’t been sleeping right next to them, they would have tried for another child right then.
“Maybe you should get on your side of the bed before we get too carried away,” she said, short of breath.
She wanted more, she wanted it all, but they did have a child to take care of before they could make another one.
“Yeah, I should,” he whispered, against her lips.
Then Malak kissed her again, taking his sweet time, holding her against his chest then slowly let go of her. Rebecca’s world was quickly beginning to lose focus and all she wanted was for her husband to make love to her.
But her child came before her own need.
“I love you,” Malak said, breaking the kiss and looking at her, his hazel eyes meeting her green ones.
“I love you, too,” she said.
After one last kiss, Malak stood up and walked to his side of the bed, effectively encircling Maki. Rebecca looked at her two men fondly. Without them, her life would be so incomplete.
It was with these thoughts in mind that she fell asleep.
Rebecca was suddenly awakened by a cry. It took her only an instant to realize Maki was having a nightmare. She turned on her side and gently shook his shoulder.
“Maki, my love, I’m right here,” she said, caressing the side of his face.
He opened his lids and green teary eyes met her.
“Did you have a bad dream, sweetheart?”
He nodded, fighting very hard not to cry.
“It’s okay, Junior,” Malak said, his eyes opening also. “We all have them.”
The deep voice seemed to calm Maki who leaned into his father. Malak grabbed Rebecca and pulled her to him, effectively trapping Maki between their two bodies. Between them, Maki giggled.
“You think it’s funny?” Rebecca asked, smiling at him.
“I’m in a parent sandwich,” he said.
“Yeah, you are,” Malak said, with a chuckle.
A few moments later, Maki relaxed against them and Rebecca looked down at him. He was looking up at her, a frown between his eyes. Gently, Rebecca tried to soften it with her thumb.
“Mum, it was not my fault, was it?” he asked, his voice small.
“No, sweetheart, it was not your fault.”
“You still love me, don’t you?”
“With all my heart, and for as long as I live. And your father loves you, too.”
“Yeah, I do,” Malak added quietly.
Maki sighed then closed his eyes. A few moments later, he was breathing softly.
“Do you think we should send him to counseling?” Rebecca asked.
“I don’t know,” Malak answered, frowning. “We’ll have to see how he does in the next few days. What about you? Do you think you may need to go?”
“I don’t know,” she answered honestly. “It was so gruesome,” she added, tears coming to her eyes again.
“I’m so sorry you had to see that.”
“I’m even more sorry I wasn’t able to stop Maki from seeing it.”
“We’ll be fine,” Malak said, caressing her cheek.
“I hope so.”
“Now, sleep, love. We’ll talk more tomorrow.”
When Rebecca woke up the next morning, she was still so very tired. She looked at the two men in her bed and her heart broke a little at the thought she wouldn’t be spending the morning with them. She quickly got dressed and shook Malak’s shoulder to wake him.
“I’ve got to go. My meeting is in an hour.”
“Okay. We’ll be here when you come back.”
“I love you.”
“I love you, too.”
“Me too, mum.”
Rebecca looked down and saw bright green eyes looking at her.
“I love you too, Maki,” she said, kissing his forehead. “Now, go back to sleep. Your father will take care of you until I return.”
Malakai closed his eyes and Rebecca felt her heart pinched at the sight of him, peaceful, in the arms of the man she loved.
With a heart that felt too big for her ribcage, she left the bedroom, fighting tears she didn’t quite understand. She would be gone for four hours, at the most, and will be back soon enough to spend the afternoon with her family.
It took her forty five minutes to drive to the office building that serve as a front to the agency in the outskirt of London. The building was small and brown, and most people believed it to be an import/export company affiliated with the international airport, which was half a mile away. Rebecca walked in, scanned her badge and walked into the office area where workers were busy maintaining the front, dealing with shipments of all kinds. Rebecca walked to a conference room then to the back of it where she scanned her badge at a door which looked like a closet. The door opened and she entered a second area which was a huge room with desks, workers, and a huge amount of surveillance equipments including televisions and satellite feed.
“Rebecca, over here,” Marie, her direct supervisor, called.
The woman was making her way towards the conference room and Rebecca fell in step besides her.
“How is the little family doing?” Maria asked.
“Not so good. My son’s friend got killed by a car in front of our house yesterday afternoon,” she answered, fighting very hard the urge to cry.
“Oh! Rebecca, I’m so so sorry,” she said. “Is Malakai okay?”
“Well, as much as he can be, due to the circumstances.”
The look in the other woman’s eyes was so sad, Rebecca felt the hair on her arm rise.
“Maria, what’s going on?” she asked as Maria opened the conference room door.
Rebecca walked inside and saw three men sitting at the table, the three of them dressed in suits and looking serious. The first one had dark hair, a five o’clock shadow, and dark brooding eyes. The second one was so skinny, Rebecca wondered if he ever hate. The last one, on the other end, was so fat, Rebecca wondered how his legs could support him.
“Take a seat, Mrs Thomas,” the dark one said.
Rebecca threw a look at her supervisor who looked away then walked to the table. She didn’t like this; she didn’t like it at all.
“Mrs Thomas, we know you have put in a request to be removed from field operating status, but we need your help.”
“No!” Rebecca said, standing up. “I’m not going anywhere.”
“Mrs Thomas, please, hear us out,” the skinny man said with a nasal voice.
But Rebecca didn’t want to. She knew if she did, they would probably guilt her into taking the assignment, and she didn’t want to go. She wanted to be home, with her family, taking care of Maki, and have another baby.
“Rebecca, please,” Maria asked, sadness still clouding her eyes.
Rebecca sighed. She regretted her decision five seconds before she made it. Then she sat.
“We need you because you’re the only one who fit the profile. We need you for a mission in Russia. We expect it to last less than two weeks. Rebecca, you’re the only one who speaks Russian good enough to pull it off,” Maria said.
“Mrs Thomas,” the dark one began, gaining her attention. “A month ago, we were finally able to make contact with a Russian who sells children to the highest bidders.”
Rebecca had known she would regret this and she sorely did. If there was something she could not stand quiet about was people who hurt children. She was a mother after all…
“We set up a meeting with him and the agent that was supposed to go was injured in a car accident yesterday. We need a replacement and fast,” the dark man explained.
“Why me?”
“Because she is in her thirties, she has green eyes and auburn hair, and she speaks perfect Russian. Mrs Thomas, you’re the only one who could go and pass as her.
“Mrs Thomas, we wouldn’t ask you if we weren’t desperate.”
Rebecca looked at her hands. She wanted to say no. She didn’t want to go. She had a child at home who needed her right now; it was not the time for her to run all over the world to try to save it when one of the most important people in her life needed her so much right now.
“Mrs Thomas?” the skinny man insisted.
“Okay. But it’s the last time, the last time ever.”
“We understand, Mrs Thomas,” the dark one said.
“Now, if you’ll excuse me, I would like to return home to spend some time with my family before I go,” she said, getting to her feet.
“Mrs Thomas, there’s no time,” the skinny one began, standing up also. “Your plane leaves in an hour.”
Rebecca threw another look at Maria who looked away.
“I don’t even have my overnight bag.”
“Don’t worry about it, Rebecca. I’ll get you what you need,” Maria said, leaving the room.
“Mrs Thomas, Mr Thomas will not be your handler for this job,” the dark man said. “Roger here will be,” he added, pointing to the fat man who waved smartly at her.
“M’am,” he said.
Malak had always been her handler and now, at the last minute, they were asking her to team up with someone she didn’t know. She felt like someone had just walked right over her grave. She felt an instant distrust of this Roger, something she could not explain but something that made her uneasy, nevertheless. There was something about his dirty green beady eyes, something untrustworthy.
“If you’re ready, Mrs Thomas, I’ll escort you to the airport and brief you on the way,” the dark man said.
Rebecca looked at the table a moment then stood. “Let’s go,” she said, all business.
But deep inside, her heart was breaking over and over again. She was leaving her baby behind, she was leaving her husband behind, and she just didn’t want to.
As they made their way to the garage, they met with Maria who gave Rebecca a bag and a briefcase which contained a computer. Rebecca took possession of them and as she followed the dark man, who she was yet to know the name of, she pulled her cell phone from her purse and dialed Malak.
“Hey!” he answered.
“Two weeks,” she just said, on the verge of tears.
“No!”
“I’ve got no choice.”
“Why wasn’t I brought in?”
“Ask Maria.”
There were so much they could not say over the phone. After all, spies could be spied on too.
“I love you,” she said. “Please tell Maki…”
She stopped talking, looking up at the ceiling, fighting her tears with all her might.
“Tell him I love him.”
“I will. I love you too. And please, come back soon so we can make that baby,” he said, a smile in his voice.
But she didn’t feel like smiling. She was scared. As a spy, she had always known to follow her instincts and they were screaming at her not to go on this mission. But children’s life depended on her going.
“Take care, love,” Malak said. “I’ll see you in two weeks.”
“Take care of Maki, okay?”
“I will.”
Without adding a word, Rebecca shut the phone and turned it off. Like she always did when she left on a mission, she would have to leave it in the lock box she would find in the car.
A few minutes later, they were on their way to the airport. Rebecca found the lock box and put her phone and purse inside, anything that would help revealed her real identity except for a bead necklace Malakai had made for her two weeks prior. That, she would keep with her.
“Passport, ID cards, business cards, and briefing material for you to read on the plane,” the skinny man said as they merge into traffic.
And as they drove, he spoke, and spoke, and spoke, explaining a lot less than what Rebecca was used to. The unease didn’t go away. In fact, the more the man spoke, the more she had a bad feeling about all this.
“Sir, I don’t think I should go,” she voiced, at one point.
“But you’re our last chance Mrs Thomas. We need to stop this guy,” the dark man said.
Rebecca only nodded, unconvinced.
“You’ll be meeting with him tomorrow at noon. We will expect you to make contact within twenty four hours for further direction. We are expecting the negotiations to last one week. After which, we will mount an operation to take him out. You will need to find his schedule, and where this could be accomplished.”
Rebecca nodded and two minutes later, she was walking in the terminal as Miss Roberta Hayes.
Moscow that time of the year was pleasant and Rebecca had spent the rest of the day doing reconnaissance and hid the incriminating documentation she had read on the plane.
She went to bed early and, the next day, dressed herself in a sharp skirt suit which made her look like a business woman. She tied her hair and, after fingering her necklace, decided to keep it on.
How she missed her little man. She hoped he was doing alright. She hoped he didn’t have nightmares the previous night, and the smile had returned to his young face. She wished she could call him and tell him how much she loved him.
But she couldn’t.
Calling could blow her cover and have her killed.
At nine o’clock, Rebecca left her room with only a handbag which contained some money, her false identity credentials, and a burner phone provided by the agency. She made her way down the stairs then outside where she called a cab.
The cab drove her to the rendezvous, which was a sumptuous building near the Kremlin. Rebecca knew the area well. She had worked on another case, in the same neighborhood and had successfully found all the secret information her agency had sent her to find. It had been a great moment in her career.
The cab pulled in front of the building, Rebecca paid the driver and got out. She looked at the building, then walked to the door and rang the bell. A few moments later, a panel was opened and two dirty green eyes, vaguely similar to Roger’s, peaked out at her.
“What is it?” the man asked in Russian.
Rebecca introduced herself and told him who she was here to see.
“We weren’t expecting you,” the man said.
As he said so, she felt the hair on the back of her neck rise. In the next moment, she felt like something as wet and humid as a worm touched her mind.
“Wait here.”
The man closed the panel and Rebecca sighed.
“Mother?”
Startled, Rebecca looked down and saw a girl stand next to her. She was no older than eight and had the most beautiful blue eyes Rebecca had ever seen.
“Mother, you are in danger,” she whispered in Russian. “They know who you are.”
“What do you mean?” she asked, hiding her discomfort as best as she could.
“Mother Rebecca, please come with me if you want to live.”
“How do you know my name?”
“There is no time to explain. They know who you are. They didn’t expect you because they killed the other one and didn’t think your agency would send someone else.
“Please, Mother, if you ever want to see your son again, follow me. Now.”
Rebecca gave a long look at the child beside her, at the hand she was offering, then took it, knowing she had just put her life in the hands of a child.
When the door opened again, three men rushed into the street, three men holding guns with silencers.
“Pretend you belong,” the child whispered. “They will believe it too.”
Keeping her head down, Rebecca did as the child said. A moment later, they turned into a side street and Rebecca came face to face with an old lady who had the same blue eyes as the child.
“Good, child, good,” she praised, caressing the top of the child’s head affectionately. “Now, come quick. We have to hide you before they find you.”
Rebecca followed the old lady to the backseat of a car and the moment the door was closed, they drove away.